“The Supercools,” Joe said, putting a name to what all three were thinking. “All of us, back together again. But why?”
“To die, of course,” laughed a cruel, familiar voice. The Supercools spun around, and found themselves face to face with their arch-nemeses, the Anticools.
“Thought you’d beaten us, huh?” asked No Powers Boy.
“Thought you’d never see us again?” taunted Mr. Negativity.
“You probably wouldn’t have,” boasted the Scavenger. “Until the Boss found us. Gave us back our powers. Made us stronger. Strong enough to destroy you.”
“Oh, I don’t think so,” laughed Kyle. Celestial Power, Negative Zone energies, and CESU sparked around the three young men, bringing their costumed identities out to play.
“You’re dead,” the evil Scavenger cackled. His electric yo-yo spun out at Joe.
“No,” Joe calmly replied, as his Sunsword sliced the electric cord in two. He took a step forward. Undaunted, the Scavenger fired his Stinger at Joe’s chest. The shots bounced harmlessly off the Wonder Glove’s forcefield.
“No,” Joe said again. He took another step forward. The Scavenger hastily switched on Humbug’s sonic apparatus. Joe’s lucky charm began to glow. For a moment, there was no sound at all, but as his deafening attack glove began to spark and smoke, the Scavenger could clearly see Joe mouth the word, ‘No.’
The two Scavengers were standing right next to one another. The Scavenger drew his electrified sword, and ran it straight at Joe’s heart. It snapped in half, as one would expect a sword made of chocolate to do. Joe shook his head slowly from side to side. Then, with one swift backhand, he put the pathetic super-villain out of his misery.
“Die!” shouted No Powers Boy, leaping at his eponymous counterpart. Kyle’s eyes glowed bright with white fire, and two twin beams of plasma shot from them, catching No Powers Boy in mid-air, and blowing him back the way he came. The Asgardian youth landed in a heap.
“Care to taste your own deepest shames?” Mr. Negativity gloated. Charles shot him in the face.
“Well, that wasn’t too hard,” said Kyle.
“At exactly which point were they our greatest enemies?” Joe asked.
“Never,” Charles replied. “They just—AAARGH!” Charles fell to the ground, writhing in pain. Behind him stood the Wizard, holding a wicked-looking device that sprayed a beam of yellow energy. Clearly, this was the source of Charles’ discomfort. The Wizard glanced sadly down for a moment at the crumpled body of the Terrifying Mitch. Behind him, the Trapster, Hydro-Man, and the Super Adapotoid flexed their muscles.
“We made one slight substitution,” the Wizard confessed. “But otherwise, we’re here. Since you chose not to lose to your most diabolical villains, why not give the first group you ever faced as a team the chance to exact its revenge?” The Wizard released the trigger on his weapon. Charles lay still, twitching occasionally. “This little gadget is made from the same design as my first invention, the one you destroyed,” the Wizard gloated. “That excruciating pain? Is from level three.” He turned the dial up another notch, then another, then another. “Want to guess what level ten is going to do to you?” He pointed the gun at Charles.
“Chuck, look out!” Joe cried. He threw himself in front of the oncoming beam, counting on his CESU to transform the Wizard’s weapon into something far less deadly. It didn’t work. The beam shot straight into Joe’s body. Nothing happened. No Negative Zone energies needed disrupting in Joe’s body, Nega-Bands or not.
“Bah! Finish them!” the Wizard ordered his teammates. The Super-Adaptoid roared, flexing the muscles of the Hulk, boasting the Scavenger’s weapons, and glowing constantly with the brimming power of No Powers Boy. Kyle himself turned to face the Super-Adaptoid, striking out with a tremendous bolt of cosmic energy designed to permanently strip away the robot’s powers. Simultaneously, the Adaptoid launched a similar beam at No Powers Boy. When the smoke cleared, the fractured, twisted remains of the Super-Adaptoid lay in a smoldering heap. Kyle stood triumphantly over the wreckage for just one moment, then looked down to make sure his own body wasn’t so disfigured. That’s when he realized he was dressed in street clothes, no longer the No Powers Boy uniform. And that’s when he realized that he could no longer access the roaring inferno of cosmic energies that seemed to have vanished from his body. Kyle picked up his S.H.I.E.L.D. laser pistol, which had fallen to the ground. It seemed pitiful by comparison. He looked at the battle taking place in front of him. “Oh damn,” said Kyle.
Hydro-Man sprang to life, forming his body into a giant tidal wave, which threatened to slam across the Supercools. Joe nonchalantly aimed his ring at Hydro-Man, and sent a wave of crippling cold straight into the villain's heart. Within moments, Hydro-Man had been transformed into the world's largest ice sculpture. That was one villain defeated, but it cost the Scavenger his attention. The Trapster fired his paste gun at a low angle, and pinned the Scavenger to the ground by his Wonder Glove. The Scavenger squeezed the finger trigger, trying to use a Wonder Blast to shake the glue loose. It cracked- a little. He fired again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again.
"Don't waste them, you idiot!" the Wizard screamed. He was dogfighting in mid-air with Mr. Negativity. Charles was playing the attack rather conservatively, but with good reason; he knew that one shot from the Wizard's gun would destroy him utterly. "The Wonder Gloves were designed to function in pairs! With only one, there's only enough battery power to use one hundred shots!" The Scavenger fired again.
"Oh," he said. "I wish I'd have known that a little sooner." He reached his free hand over, and slid his hand out of the glove.
"Oh damn!" shouted Kyle, and everyone turned to see what the fuss was about. Kyle had climbed- God knows how- to the top of the Hydro-Man/ice figure, and was teetering there dangerously. He threw his weight forward, and the sculpture began to topple. "Ooooooh daaaaaamn!" Kyle fell from the edge of the sculpture as the whole structure came down- right on top of the Trapster. Hanging in mid-air, Kyle clutched desperately for the Wizard, and somehow managed to grab the villain by the waist. The Wizard dropped his gun in the grass as he and Kyle came crashing to the ground in front of the Scavenger. Mr. Negativity flew in, reluctant to attack with Kyle so nearby. The Wizard pointed his glove at the Scavenger, and all four combatants simultaneously realized that the glove's firing chamber had been mangled by the fall. Everyone jumped at the Wizard as he pulled a capsule from his belt and smeared its contents across the Scavenger's Wonder Glove. The Trapster's glue began to melt away. A tussle ensued, which ended with Mr. Negativity pinning the Scavenger pinning the Wizard, who was unsteadily pointing the trigger of the Wonder Glove at Kyle.
"One more move and I kill him," the Wizard snarled. The Scavenger wrestled his way free of Mr. Negativity, and stood up, posing triumphantly.
"The game's up, Wizard!" he shouted gleefully. "There are no more shots left in that Wonder Glove!"
"You don't think I'm going to fall for that old trick, do you?" the Wizard snarled.
"It's not a trick," the Scavenger insisted. "You already shot it once at the Human Torch. Then there were three shots at the Trapster, three at the Terrifying Mitch, three more at the Trapster, three more at the Terrifying Mitch, one at Chuck in the Fantastic Four's headquarters, one at Moondragon on Monster Island, one at the evil Mr. Negativity, another one at Charles during practice, two at the Red Skull's cuboid, one at the Dungeonmaster's dragon, three at the Doomsmen who attacked our apartment, two while fighting Graviton, four on the Skrull Throneworld, six at Oracle on the moon, one vs. M at the Massachusetts Academy, then ten at Synch at the same time, four at soldiers drawn from throughout time, one at Riptide, one at Viper in Madripoor, one shot at Spoilsport, one at Hindsight Lad during the Contest of Champions, two against Pretty Persuasions, seven at those fucking X-Babies, one at D-Man, one at the wall of the airport coming back from Atlanta, one at Beautiful, three against Boomerang, one at the Brothers Grimm's bomb, three at the Absorbing Man, three at the Wrecking Crew, three at Doom’s soldiers as we ran for cover, one at the embassy door, two at the Grey Gargoyle, three at the Raiders, one at the Red Ghost’s baboon, one at the Red Ghost’s orangutan, two at Klaw, and ten just now into the Trapster's paste!"
"That's not one hundred shots!" the Wizard insisted. Joe recounted.
"One plus three plus three plus three plus three plus one plus one plus one plus one plus two plus one plus three plus two plus four plus six plus one plus ten plus four plus one plus one plus one plus one plus two plus seven plus one plus one plus one plus three plus one plus three plus three plus three plus one plus two plus three plus one plus one plus two plus ten." Everyone did the math in his head.
"No," Charles corrected him. "You only shot one time fighting Graviton. That's one plus three plus three plus three plus three plus one plus one plus one plus one plus two plus one plus one plus three plus four plus six plus one plus ten plus four plus one plus one plus one plus one plus two plus seven plus one plus one plus one plus three plus one plus three plus three plus three plus one plus two plus three plus one plus one plus two plus ten."
"Even if you were right," Joe insisted, "That would be one plus three plus three plus three plus three plus one plus one plus one plus one plus two plus one plus three plus one plus four plus six plus one plus ten plus four plus one plus one plus one plus one plus two plus seven plus one plus one plus one plus three plus one plus three plus three plus three plus one plus two plus three plus one plus one plus two plus ten, not one plus three plus three plus three plus three plus one plus one plus one plus one plus two plus one plus one plus three plus four plus six plus one plus ten plus four plus one plus one plus one plus one plus two plus seven plus one plus one plus one plus three plus one plus three plus three plus three plus one plus two plus three plus one plus one plus two plus ten."
"Fine!" the Wizard shouted. "One plus two plus- shut up!" He turned back towards Kyle. Charles jumped in, catching the Wizard by the wrist, and moving his hand aside just in time to keep the Wonder Glove blast from incinerating Kyle. Kyle just glared at Joe. Joe started counting on his hands. "One plus three plus..." A loud rumble in the distance brought his attention back to the battle.
Joe strapped “his” Wonder Glove back on, then pulled the power pack from the Wizard’s other glove and set the two to recharging. “What now?” he mumbled.
“Us!” came the reply, as Sunshine, Lollipops, and Rainbows teleported in on a spectral wave. “The master brought you here so we can finally have our vengeance!” Lollipops continued. And then, they leapt into battle.
Mr. Negativity flew into the air, determined to once more draw the energy from Sunshine’s solar-powered body. In mid-air, however, he was stopped short by the sudden appearance of tightly-constricting bands of rainbow energy. Charles pushed against the bands with all of his power, but their leverage was too strong; the bands held. He was forced to watch, helplessly, as Sunshine released a blistering hot bolt of energy at the Scavenger. Taken off guard and unable to dodge, Joe was only able to raise the Wonder Glove’s forcefield in time to absorb most of the energy. Stunned and still under fire, the Scavenger knew that his forcefield wouldn’t hold out forever, but he didn’t dare counterattack while he was still pinned down. Kyle aimed his laser pistol at Lollipops, and let out a few half-hearted shots, but the assassin was able to dodge them all-too-easily. With a flick of her wrist, she launched one of her lollistaves into Kyle’s hand, forcing him to drop the weapon. She sprinted forward, curled her fingers around Kyle’s face, and activated her psionic power. The pleasure centers of Kyle’s brain flared, sending him on an all-too powerful sugar high that left him unable to do anything but smile a lot and drool even more. Lollipops retrieve her weapon, and raised it high over Kyle’s head. Kyle saw the killing blow about to fall, and smiled at it.
“I can’t,” she said. “I can’t kill these young men. This isn’t Kyle, the mad god. This is just a pathetic young man, unable to hurt anyone or do anything. We thought we were here for vengeance, to save our world, but this isn’t right. Sunshine, Rainbows- release your attacks. Mr. Negativity flexed his arms as the bands constricting them vanished, and the Scavenger paused to catch his breath as the steam-room heat around him vanished. Suddenly, a gout of flame appeared in the middle of the clearing, and resolved itself into the shape of Mephisto, Lord of the Underworld.
“No!” Mephisto whined. “We had a deal. I led you right to them! You can have your vengeance! Destroy them, kill the Supercools here in my dimension, and with the power I gain from their three otherworldly souls, I will grant you whatever you desire!”
“Forget it, Mephisto!” yelled Sunshine. “We’re sorry we ever agreed to your plan, and we’ll fight you to free these guys if that’s what it’s going to take!”
“Oh, that’s what it’s going to take,” cackled Mephisto. “You three made a deal with a devil- do you think you’re getting out of my world intact?” He snapped his fingers, and in a burst of flame, Hydro-Man, the Trapster, and the Wizard stood restored and refreshed. The Wizard looked admiringly at the brand-new Wonder Gloves he’d been fitted with. With another wave of his hand, Mephisto restored the Super-Adaptoid, and with another, the Anticools. The Scavenger’s new sword gleamed with a wicked light. “Think the six of you can beat the seven of us?” the Trapster laughed.
“They’re not alone!” Suddenly, the curtain between dimensions parted, and from the Marvel Universe proper came Goodwill, Haywire, Timeslip, the Deaf Leopard, the Rock, Dreamboat Annie, Electric Youth, and Doppleganger. “It’s a Supercools reunion!” cheered Goodwill. “And you guys don’t have a prayer.” Mephisto’s eyebrow arched, and suddenly Charles screamed in pain. Mr. Negativity fell to the ground and fell to his knees as two thick, black, muscular arms suddenly burst from his chest. As everyone looked on in horror, a tall, powerful man of pure Negative Zone energy actually crawled and pulled his way out of Charles’ body. “At last,” he gasped. “A nexus. I’ve floated blindly through that goddamned zone for way too long.”
“No!” Lollipops shouted. “You can’t have survived. The Negative Man!”
“And company,” the Negative Man leered evilly. He blinked, and suddenly his agents- Killing Time, Garrote, the Brat, Madame Talula, and the Ooze appeared, as well, held safely in stasis by Rick Jones and his Nega-Bands.
“Kill them,” Mephisto said, “And their place in this world is yours.”
“Gladly,” cackled the Negative Man. He thrust both arms forward, and a wave of Negative Zone energies swept toward the group.
“Look out!” Charles cried. He threw himself forward, contorting his body and stretching it to the very limits of his form. Charles became a living wall against the wave of energy, which dissipated harmlessly when the two met. The Negative Man’s eyes grew wide in shock.
“A new trick,” he said breathlessly. And suddenly, the Nega-Bands appeared on his wrists. “No matter. The Negative Zone is mine to control, and your powers will be mine once I’ve absorbed you fully into the Zone.” The Negative Man lunged forward, and seized a hold of Chuck’s neck. Charles felt himself being pulled in the Nega-Bands, and into the Negative Man. He resisted with all his strength, desperately wrestling against the crushing power. Meanwhile, thirteen superheroes stared down thirteen supervillains. Mephisto conjured himself a throne and sat back to watch. “Let this be our final battle,” he intoned. And it was.
Les Ryker, Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., the Doppleganger, and the man formerly known as the Skrull known as Elyk, was no stranger to shifting identities. Neither was his opponent. Bill Schofeld had been many things in his lifetime- husband, father, brother, son, Marine, Terrifying Mitch, the Scavenger, teammate, partner, and friend. Both men relished the combat before it even began. Both men had lived many lives, and never found the one that seemed to click. Neither was sure where he belonged, but both knew how to handle themselves in a fight. Battles were easy; living was hard. They prepared to battle.
Ryker’s S.H.I.E.L.D. training took over first. He dived into a low roll, firing several shots from his laser pistol towards the Scavenger. Humbug’s gloves took over, knocking the bolts aside with a wall of solidified sound. That was a new trick for all three men, a minor revision by Mephisto’s power. Still, the Scavenger was able to push past his surprise quickly enough to return fire with the Red Bee’s stinging electric blast. The bolt caught Ryker’s hand and easily scrapped his only weapon. Ryker backed away as the Scavenger ignited his electrified sword, and made several practice swings in mid-air. Ryker knew, though, that he couldn’t back away forever, and as the Scavenger brought his sword swinging down yet again, Ryker suddenly shifted his forearm to resemble a similar sword, simultaneously hardening his skin to resist the blade. The force of the electricity slammed through Ryker’s system as the two made contact, but the sudden parrying of the Scavenger’s blow gave Ryker a moment of surprise. He elaborated the muscles in his free arm, giving himself a stronger punch, which he brought squarely into the Scavenger’s jaw. Startled, the Scavenger fell to the ground, and dropped his sword. His hand reached for Humbug’s gauntlet, twisted the knob, and brought the sound of ten thousand chirping crickets roaring into being. He was too late. Ryker had already anticipated the attack, and sealed his ears with his shape-shifting powers. One last, good kick put the Scavenger out of the battle.
The moment the battle began, the Wizard took off into the air. It was, after all, a strategically advantageous position. Mostly, though, he wanted to compare his own craftsmanship with Mephisto’s magic. He was a little disappointed to find that the gloves Mephisto conjured worked as well as, if not better than, his own. The Wizard was so intent on his experiment that when he returned his attention to the battle at hand, he found himself in an altogether new environment. He hadn’t remembered a desert nearby, but the hot sun, the white sand, and the rocky cliffs were certainly proof enough. In a land of magic, anything was possible.
The battlefield was empty except for himself and a young girl. She barely seemed old enough to be a hero, but they were starting younger and younger these days. He swooped in for the kill. Suddenly, he was dazed, and in pain. Had he crashed into something? No, there was nothing in front of him but open sky. Right? He fired a Wonder Blast. The bolt seemed to fly off into the distance, but the Wizard’s keen eyes detected just a little bit of debris only a few feet ahead. So, then, the girl was an illusionist. Was the desert scene real at all? Only one way to find out. He shot a vortex beam (Mephisto even thought to include that!) at the ground, near where the young girl made herself out to be standing. Sure enough, the sand stayed put- it wasn’t caught in the swirling, rushing winds. But something was! He couldn’t be positive, but the Wizard swore he’d seen a wisp of hair float through the vortex, for only a second. Lost your concentration, honey? He fired to the immediate right of the vortex, and was rewarded by “reality,” as the desert scene faded away. Dreamboat Annie wavered for a moment, then fell to the ground, defeated.
“This really is quite an honor for me,” Goodwill said, ducking underneath a glob of adhesive fired from the Trapster’s paste-gun. “I mean, fighting the Trapster. You’re like the Supercools’ ultimate arch-nemesis or something.” She jumped above another shot, smiling. “Dad never really told me that whole story, but he certainly had a lot of respect for you.” She let the next shot vanish into the swirls of her cape. “It’s almost a shame, really, to have to do this to you.” She pulled a small metal egg from within her pocket dimension, and tossed it fluidly into the Trapster’s chest. The egg sprang open, spraying metal coils everywhere, which quickly tightened to hold the Trapster in place. With his arms and legs pressed into his body, the Trapster lost his balance, and fell to the ground, where the impact knocked him out.
“Hmm,” CJ said. “Maybe he gets a lot tougher.”
Mr. Negativity looked at Kyle. Kyle smiled a very big smile.
“You’re worthless,” Mr. Negativity said. Kyle smiled. “Look at your life- your friends have no respect for you. You don’t even have a real job. You don’t have any powers, you’re too inept to do anything to me physically. You can’t possibly defeat me. Goddamn, boy, what the hell’s the matter with you?” Kyle kept smiling. Mr. Negativity pushed himself further into Kyle’s mind, reaching out with his mental malaise, leeching still more happiness out of Kyle. Thanks to Lollipops’ earlier intervention, Kyle had lots of happiness to give. Mr. Negativity kept pulling, stretching his powers to the utmost. “You lost your only shot with Rina. You only had a shot because you weren’t even really you. You’ll never get home. You- urk.” Mr. Negativity fell over, his brain fried by Kyle’s excessive cheeriness. Suddenly, the spell broke. Kyle looked down at Mr. Negativity, then looked around, trying to figure out exactly where he was and what was going on. He looked back down at Mr. Negativity. “I rule,” he said.
Madame Talula laughed a hearty laugh as she swung her ball-and-chain above her head. “Sit still now, little one,” she cooed to Electric Youth. “Auntie Talula just wants to smack you once. That’s all it’s gonna take.” With the speed of a striking cobra, the ball suddenly whipped to the ground. Electric Youth jumped out of the way. Barely. The ball came back over Talula’s head, spinning again. “Just one,” she laughed.
“I don’t think so,” Electric Youth replied. Two sparks of electricity shot from his hands, catching Madame Talula in the chest and shoulder. She laughed ever harder. “Insulated costume. Doesn’t hurt.” Her fingers tightened around the cord, and the ball came down again. It was easier to dodge this time, but Electric Youth had a sneaking suspicion he knew why. Talula had tested him. He’d blasted her with everything he had, and it couldn’t hurt her. She was toying with him. He fired a few more times, if only to seem intimidating. The ball came down again. And again. Talula ran her fingers along the base of the chain, and suddenly Electric Youth knew how he could get to her. The ball came down again, and this time, Electric Youth came down right on top of it. He emptied his body’s power reserve into the ball, and electricity shot up the metal cable to Madame Talula’s bare hands. She shrieked in rage and moaned in ecstacy as the bolt fried her brain. Electric Youth breathed a sigh of relief; it had taken all the power he had, but he’d won.
The Deaf Leopard was a hero, technically, but he certainly wasn’t very heroic. When the battle began, he crossed the field halfway to take on Rick Jones. He’d assumed the guy without a costume would be the easiest to defeat. Rick wasn’t completely helpless, though. When the Negative Man reclaimed the Nega-Bands, Rick pulled free the battle cannon he often wore strapped to his back. As the Deaf Leopard pounced, Rick fired. Unfortunately for Rick, the Deaf Leopard was already too close. The shot went wide, and the Leopard landed hard against Rick’s leg. A follow-up slice of his claws managed to shred Rick’s jacket- and some of the flesh underneath. Desperately, Rick flailed his arms, and caught the Deaf Leopard in the side of the head with a pretty feeble punch. Rick threw his weight forward, and knocked the Deaf Leopard off balance, then snatched for his gun. He brought the barrel swinging around, and this time hit the Deaf Leopard much harder. Carlos went down in a heap, temporarily stunned. The Negative Man laughed cruelly, and through the psychic bond they shared, Rick Jones felt it. He felt the Negative Man’s mind press against his own, forcing him to act. He turned the gun around, pressed the edge of it to the Deaf Leopard’s forehead, and pulled the trigger. Inside, Rick cried as the Negative Man roared in delight.
The Rock’s hands flew to his throat. Blood poured from a dozen small cuts as the barbed wire pressed deeper into his throat. He couldn’t breathe. Immediately, instinctively, Dylan’s density tripled, quadrupled, pentupled, until the wire could no longer pierce his throat. It was no help. The blood was still there. He still couldn’t breathe. He tried to slip his fingers between the cord and his neck. It was no use. He saw a man with shaggy brown hair staring intently, and suddenly Dylan knew why he could no longer breathe. Spots danced in front of his eyes. The end was almost near. Suddenly, Dylan’s density plunged, as he pushed forward with both feet. The Rock took off like a shot, leaping for Garrote and the two collided, tumbling into a heap together. The cord didn’t move. Slowly, his density increased again. Garrote was pinned under the Rock’s weight. Dylan’s face turned blue as he pressed his knees into the villain’s chest. His density increased again, and the pressure against Garrote’s suddenly took his breath away, too. Dylan’s eyes sagged. Several of Garrote’s ribs cracked. The Rock’s density increased again. Something had to give, and finally, it did. Garrote began to gasp and wheeze impotently as his lungs burst under the Rock’s weight. Dylan sucked in a tremendous breath as the cord around his neck vanished. Garrote’s eyes bulged from his head and, as the Rock caught his own breath, the sadistic killer asphyxiated, knowing at last what all of his victims must have felt like.
Timeslip had already chosen the girl encased head-to-toe in leather as her target. Something about her seemed familiar, but Rina had no idea what until she activated her power. Instead of blurring the time around her, Rina’s consciousness fragmented, sharing space with herself throughout her own timeline, as well as that of Killing Time, her other-dimensional counterpart. Even as part of her wondered absently when exactly she left Harry’s apartment, another part of her was in that other dimension, facing Kyle’s rage. She’d rebuked him, cast him aside. In his omnipotent grace, he’d allowed her to live, but now this Rina had to remember for the first time having a tight leather costume seared into every part of body, encasing away her skin for the rest of her life. Kyle didn’t laugh as he did it; he didn’t cry. He told her, coldly, simply, that he never wanted to see her face again. He wouldn’t have to, after this. Rina screamed her counterpart’s agony, and screamed for the loss of her own stability. Finally, she landed back in the present as her thoughts once more became her own. Her body was not. The scary part was how familiar it all was, the feel of the leather/skin. She drew one of her katanas. Rina cast her eyes upon her own body, and saw Killing Time’s eyes staring back at her. She knew what she had to do. She knew what Killing Time wanted, had always wanted, but been unable to do. Rina pressed the end of the katana against her stomach- against Killing Time’s stomach. Killing Time’s eyes shone as Rina’s body smiled. Rina drove the blade home. There was a white-hot flash of searing pain. She closed her eyes. When she opened them again, she was back in her own body. Killing Time lay dead, apparently of a self-inflicted wound, on the ground in front of her. Rina curled herself into a ball and began to sob.
No Powers Boy was a native of the land of Asgard. He was used to the blistering heat of more than just one sun, and each more powerful than our own. He thought it would be, well, child’s play to defeat a man whose power was drawn from a more earthly sun. But somehow, Sunshine managed to hover just out of reach, and somehow managed to slide away from whatever rock, stick, or other projectile No Powers Boy managed to hurl his way. Sunshine’s blasts didn’t hurt much, but they did hurt, and No Powers Boy felt himself weakening with every passing minute. By the time Sunshine swooped in close for one all-out blast, No Powers Boy was already on his last leg. He felt the blistering heat of Sunshine’s attack, and his last thought before passing out was how cool the breeze felt as the attack ended.
Lollipops darted in and out of the Brat’s attacks, landing a shot here and a backhand there. The Brat, for his part, was much more used to open brawls, and his temper rose as the girl- the human girl!- danced merrily away from his every punch. Lollipops’ staves bounced across the Brat’s back, but even her strongest blows only managed to bruise his tough Asgardian skin. The two were stalemated. They drew back from one another as each caught their breath. Then, the two came at one another again. Back and forth they battled, one unable to strike and the other unable to wound. Each time they withdrew, then moved back into the duel with a renewed determination.
Finally, Lollipops realized that she couldn’t continue to pace the relentless dynamo she opposed. She attacked again, moving for the Brat’s head not with her fist, but with her open hand. The sugary-sweet psionic energy within her flowed into the Brat. It didn’t work. Maybe it was something not quite the same in his Asgardian brain. Maybe it was his youthful outlook, or maybe it was his blinding fury. Probably, though, it was that her power filled her opponent’s with joy, and nothing gave the Brat more pleasure than pounding on the weak. She may well have stopped him, if she’d been given a few more seconds. But the moment she let her guard down to activate her power, Lollipops felt the full force of the Brat’s punch driven into her body. She sailed through the air, finally crashing against a house that was a blend of three very different homes. Her body sagged, and then was still.
Rainbows shrieked as the Ooze’s green, dripping, only vaguely humanoid form shambled toward him. It was an act of pure terror, but then the adrenaline kicked in. He fired a beam of rainbow energy at his attacker, slicing the creature in half and dropping it to the ground. The Ooze’s parts shifted and squirmed, pulling themselves back together. Then the Skrull/Mutant hybrid shot from the ground toward Rainbows. Rainbows barely had enough time to teleport before the thing landed, and even then didn’t make it very far. He tried again, this time to encase the monster in bands of spectral energy. The thing dripped its way free of Rainbows’ prison. It jumped forward again, and this time Rainbows blocked with a wall of energy. The slime shot inhumanly fast around both sides of the wall, catching Rainbows off- guard. It slammed into both sides of Rainbows’ head, knocking him cold. That saved Rainbows’ life. His usual strangulation attack thwarted, the Ooze slid back into combat, searching for a new victim.
Hydro-Man just couldn’t stop laughing. Haywire had attacked the first person he saw, tangling the villain in a mass of steel-hard string. He hadn’t realized the Hydro-Man’s water form would have no problem sliding out of the entanglement. Harry dodged a few of Hydro-Man’s pressurized blasts, then tried different tack. He focused on creating a mass of string- a very absorbent mass of string- in the center of Hydro-Man’s body. It was no use. He saw Hydro-Man cringe, probably very uncomfortable, but Harry realized he didn’t have the ability to create as much wire as it would take to sop up all of Hydro-Man’s body. He scanned the skies, and tried again. He mentally wrapped a metal cable around a low-hanging power line, and sent the other end into Hydro-Man’s watery form. Hydro-Man howled in pain as his watery form dissipated. Harry took a moment to relax before he realized that the puddle right behind him was rising into a human shape.
“That...was a good shot,” Hydro-Man sighed. “But not... good enough.” He slammed his wet fists into Harry’s back, and Haywire went down for the count.
“This cannot possibly be a good thing,” the Scavenger said. He looked at the Super-Adaptoid, which had already replicated the powers of all the nearby combatants. Lollistaves, Paste-Guns, Solar Energy, Electric Energy, and All. He sighed once, and knew he had to try. He shot a ray of cold from the Mandarin’s ring. Sunshine’s energy dissolved it almost at once. The Scavenger tried a Wonder-Blast. It met with Asgardian skin, and had no effect. The Super-Adaptoid retaliated with a burst of superhuman speed, knocking Joe to the ground. As it advanced slowly toward the downed Scavenger, the Super-Adaptoid actually cracked its mammoth knuckles. Joe nearly laughed as the desperate, stupid thought came into his head that whomever programmed the killing machine must have had a sense of humor. His eyes widened.
It’s just a mindless robot, he reminded himself mentally. The Super-Adaptoid took another step forward. A soulless killing machine. The Super-Adaptoid raised itself to its full eight-foot stature above the Scavenger and prepared to deliver it’s final blow. Joe closed his eyes, and concentrated on keeping that one thought in his head. That’s all it is, he told himself. It’s complicated, and powerful, sure, but it’s still just a self-propelled, soulless, mindless, killing machine robot. It’s nothing more than a tool. A weapon. He opened his eyes to see the Super-Adaptoid’s fist, and then to watch it explode in a shower of sparks. The Super-Adaptoid’s eyes widened for just a moment, and then it shattered, raining each of its tiny parts across the field. And everywhere one of those parts landed, it formed itself into a perfect, glittering diamond. The Scavenger put his hands around Cestus, and breathed a sigh of relief.
“I could bring them all back. Like that.” Mephisto bragged. “This battle will never end.”
“They’re winning,” Colin said in return. “The good guys are beating the bad guys, and they always will. Joe, Chuck, and Kyle are unstoppable.”
“You know,” Mephisto said. “I truly think you’re right. There’s something about these guys I haven’t quite pegged, but I do believe they’d eventually fight their way out of here. Of course, they’re friends aren’t so lucky. One of them is dead already. How many do you think they could save, before they did make their way out? Would Dreamboat Annie survive? Would Rina?” He smiled diabolically.
“Why are you telling me this? Just do it, if you’re going to. Bring the villains back, and let them try again. The Supercools will find a way.”
“Maybe they’re counting on you to save the day,” Mephisto suggested. “Maybe they’re waiting for you to bargain their lives and souls to safety.”
“How?” asked Colin.
“Simple,” Mephisto said. “The battle proceeds. I won’t interfere. Whoever is left standing at the end will go free. In return, I only want one soul. One young, innocent soul, given over to me of his own free will. Your soul, Colin. Give it to me, and your friends will have a chance at victory. Keep it, be selfish, and watch them die. And then your soul will be mine anyway.”
“I- Okay! Okay, take it, just let them have a chance!” And Mephisto laughed.
“Human minds are so easy to manipulate. It’s tremendous fun to plant a thought, but it’s easier still to make one disappear. To strip their memories away. It will be like you never existed to them at all....”
“Wizard, down here!” called the Terrifying Mitch. He waved his arms frantically back and forth, signaling for his erstwhile teammate. The Wizard swooped in low to see what Bill wanted.
“Sucker!” taunted the Mitch as he brought his clasped hands crashing into the Wizard’s chin. He laughed again, and returned to his normal form. The Doppleganger moved in on the Wizard again, turning the villain’s helmet sideways before he could react. “You don’t remember me, do you , Wizard?” Agent Ryker’s face contorted again. “I looked like this then, Wizard. I looked like this when you took her from me!” His fists fell again and again, crashing into the Wizard’s body, long after the villain was unconscious.
“Doppleganger!” Electric Youth cried, pulling his teammate away from the Wizard. “That’s enough! You’ll kill him!”
“Good!” Ryker said, pushing Electric Youth aside. The young man fell to the ground, and landed right on top of the encroaching Ooze. Ryker had already turned away when the Ooze wrapped itself around Electric Youth’s head. Ben clutched at the slime, trying desperately to pull it away from his face. He gasped for air that wasn’t coming, and the Ooze slid further down his throat and into his lungs. I’ve got to have one more, he thought. Just one charge left in me! Ben reached deep down in to himself, straining for the energy he needed to blow the Ooze away. It wasn’t there. And then suddenly, Ben’s adrenaline sparked, and all of the latent electrical energy came pouring out. Ben’s body was vaporized instantly as the electrical synapses in his brain fired, casting bolts of lightning everywhere. When the electric field dissipated, Electric Youth and the Ooze were both gone.
Rick Jones grazed Doppleganger’s skull with a shot from his cannon. Doppleganger dropped to the ground, bleeding from a flesh wound. Rick shouldered his gun again and worked to correct that oversight. Goodwill saw him aim the shot, and knew she had to do something. As she reached for her cape, though, she suddenly felt her hands pass through the cape, rather than into it. As she looked down, she realized that she was fading away- fading back to her own time. “No, not now!” she screamed. “Not fucking now, it’s not fair!” She’d been sent from the future to destroy the only father she’d ever known- to write one of the Supercools out of existence. If she was disappearing now, it meant that she’d succeeded- that she’d set an irrevocable chain of events into motion. There’d be time for mourning later. Right now, she had to save Ryker’s life. She leapt, and her arms wrapped around Rick Jones’s body. The two vanished down the timestream, just as the Rock’s unconscious body came flying through the spot where they’d just been standing. The Brat turned to catch a face full of solar energy. Sunshine blasted the boy, then flew back into the air. The strategy had worked so well against No Powers Boy, there seemed no reason to believe that it wouldn’t handle his counterpart. Unfortunately, Sunshine didn’t count on the Brat being much more vicious than his twin. Instead of flinging rocks, the Brat uprooted an entire tree, and swung it baseball-style, with all his strength at Sunshine. Jason went sailing back, too stunned to regain control. He’d gotten pretty far into the air when his powers cut out entirely, and Jason Jupiter plummeted to the ground below. Joe, Hydro-Man, and Kyle heard the crack of Jason’s neck when he landed, and knew that there would be no more Sunshine.
“Who’s next?” cackled the Brat.
“You sick bastard!” roared Colin. “I hate you!” Flames smoldered in his eyes. “You don’t deserve to live! Die!” The flames burst from his hands, mouth, and eyes, and consumed the Brat, body and soul.
“Excellent,” cackled Mephisto.
And suddenly, the flames were doused, as Hydro-Man came roaring onto the scene, sweeping Joe away with his tide. Taken by surprise, Joe didn’t even have time to catch his breath, and he didn’t dare try his freezing trick again- not from inside. Joe would be dead in moments, and Kyle knew it, just as he knew he was his friends’ only hope. He scooped the Scavenger’s electrified sword off the ground, activated the switch on the handle, again tossed the weapon into Hydro-Man. The villain roared in pain again, and then suddenly burst open in a silent explosion of water and energy. Joe went sailing, crashing against the wall of the Best IMAX Library. Kyle was knocked backwards onto his back. Hydro-Man was brought, human again, to the ground. Kyle reached behind himself. Something was digging into the small of his back. When he realized what it was, he knew what he had to do.
Charles was still fighting the Negative Man, but he was slowly losing that battle. Already, his arms and legs were completely submerged within the Negative Man’s form. In a matter of moments, he’d be swallowed completely. Kyle and Joe saw what was about to happen, and knew that they couldn’t let their friend live as an evil villain. Joe saw what Kyle was holding, and shouted, “Do it, Kyle! It’s the only way!” Kyle hesitated. Charles saw what Joe intended through their psychic link. “No, Joe, NO!” he shouted. “Do it, Kyle!” Joe yelled. Kyle aimed the Wizard’s gun, and pulled the trigger.
And moments before the shot landed, Joe slammed the Nega-Bands together. CLANG! The beam of energy struck the Negative Man, who had only enough time to roar in pain before being stripped from reality altogether. Joe, for his part, was unharmed by the beam, but the fraction of a second he’d spent in the Negative Zone had taken its toll. His arms and legs were entirely charred; both hands were missing altogether. His chest was open, bare ribs and organs exposed. His stomach was spared a similar fate only because of the invulnerable nature of Cestus. Astoundingly, Joe was still conscious, if only for a moment.
“Yes!” cried Mephisto.
“No!” shouted Rina. Around the battlefield, Supercools were coming awake.
“He’s- he’s dead,” Rainbows said.
“No, he isn’t,” said a voice. From the shadows stepped a man dressed only in a long blue robe.
“Storyteller!” Lollipops exclaimed.
“Yes,” Storyteller said. “I hitched a ride with the Negative Man, but didn’t dare show my face until now. In fact, show my face is precisely what I intend to do.” He reached for the hood of his robe. “Joe Faust will not die today, and this is why.” He pulled the hood of his robe down, exposing his face.
“Oh!” cried Charles. “It’s you!”
"Yes," the Storyteller confessed. "I'm sure you're confused. I'm probably the last person whose other-dimensional counterpart you ever expected to meet."
"Except maybe Celine Dion," Kyle said. "Or Elvira, Mistress of the Dark."
"On Sunshine, Lollipops, and Rainbows' world, I'm called the Storyteller, but you probably want to call me Terraform. Or Mold. Or Sam Philmore."
"What?" said Charles.
"This isn't even the Marvel Universe!" Kyle shouted, understanding. "It's that world where Joe is God, and he's somehow managed to pull us all into it with him!"
"So Joe can't die?" Charles asked.
"Oh, he can die," Mold said. "He's been hurt, right? He's subconsciously playing along with his own game. To live, he just needs to accept his Godhood and send the three of you home."
"Isn't that sort of cheating?" Kyle asked.
"Kyle, shut up!" Charles said.
"Yeah, really," Joe said. He stood up, miraculously healed. "I guess I should have figured it all out sooner, what with all the clues and all. It's been fun, guys, but I think it's time we go home." Charles hesitated for a moment. "Or," Joe said, cutting off his thought, "You can continue to live in a world where I'm God and I know it." Charles suddenly missed his home very much. "I'll send us back," Joe said, "And fix it so we can't ever come back- there's too much potential to screw too much up otherwise. But first, we're all leaving." He blinked, and the Supercools and villains were in Central Park, away from Mephisto's influence. "And I'm putting this stuff back." Cestus and the belt of strength vanished. Joe looked around one last time, then closed his eyes.
-Epilogue-
Greetings. I am Uatu, the Watcher. I have seen a great many fucked up things in my day, but I assure you, the story which preceded these notes take the cake. So far. The Story is over now, and long may it rest in peace. But what became of the characters you’ve undoubtedly grown to love and hate?
Talula Baird’s funeral was held two days later. When she’d died, she’d had no tenants, and it had taken some time for her body to be discovered. Talula’s sister came into town, mostly to reclaim the Bed & Breakfast. Even Talula’s mutant son was absent. He didn’t dare come to the funeral; he didn’t trust himself. Colin Weatherstaff was at the funeral, but he kept a nervous eye on the priest the whole time. When the service was over, he called the holy man aside.
“Would you like to talk about your grief, my son?” the priest asked.
“No,” Colin said. “I’d like to share a proposition with you.” His eyes looked like two burning embers.
“They’re gone again,” Rina said.
“Yes,” Harry said. “I think they’re really gone for good.”
“No, Harry, I’m sorry,” Rina said, shaking her head. “Maybe it’s selfish of me, but I haven’t even started to think about the guys yet. I’ve been through to much recently. I meant my powers. My powers are gone again. I don’t know if they’ll ever come back.” Harry reached out an arm, to comfort Rina. She brushed his hand away.
“I love you, Harry,” she said. “I probably always will. But it’s too much, too fast, for both of us. You have a wonderful life in Washington, and I wish you the best of luck with it. I’m staying here in New York. I have a lot to work through. And who knows? Maybe in a few years-?” This time, she didn’t move the hand he offered. He bent in, and kissed her.
“Goodbye Rina,” he said.
“’Bye, Milo,” she laughed.
“Mrs. Lee! What a rare pleasure! We haven’t seen you here in some time!” Ricki Lee stepped into the upper lobby of Dopple Industries, a division of the Roxxon Corporation.
“Yes,” she said, smiling at the doorman. “I took an extended vacation, and left my holdings in others’ names. But I think I’d like to reclaim them now.” She paused to look around, and if her eyes changed to a different color for a moment, the doorman surely didn’t notice. “Yes,” she said, nodding. “I think I could do a lot of good here.”
Rainbows, Lollipops, Dreamboat Annie, and the Rock stood over their friends’ graves. Ben Brixton, Jason Jupiter, and Carlos Martinez were buried in the same cemetery, their plots right next to one another. Dreamboat Annie brushed away a tear.
“They died saving the world,” she said. “And it wasn’t even their world. I just wish I could remember more of it! I want to remember why they died! Weren’t there others? Young men?”
“Honey, don’t hurt yourself,” Lollipops scolded gently. “It’s fading from our minds, too. They were our friends. We know they died for a good cause- that’s all that matters. That, and where we go from here.”
“We’ve got a couple million dollars in raw diamonds,” Rainbows said. “That should last us for a while.”
“Until the Super-Adaptoid wants them back, anyway,” laughed the Rock. “And there’s no question of where we go from here- we’re superheroes, aren’t we?” He put his hand out toward them.
“Yes,” Dreamboat Annie said. “We’re Supercools.” She placed his hand on his.
“Supercools,” Rainbows agreed, adding his hand to the stack.
“Fine,” Lollipops said, putting her hand into the ring, as well. “Supercools. At least until we can think of something better.”
Bill Schofeld had been sitting in this same room for almost two hours. The walls were all white, and there was only one door. No windows. He was sitting in one simple wooden chair; there was one just like it across the simple table that sat in the middle of the room. On the table were files- his own civilian and military records, photographs, news stories, criminal records for other superhumans, including his old partners, Dismay and Haffnur, as well as a few other villains he didn’t recognize. There were diagrams for some new sort of projectile weapons, and a few rough costume design sketches. None of it made a lot of sense to Bill, but he read through it all anyway. Finally, an aggressive-looking blonde woman came stalking through the door.
“Mr. Schofeld,” she said, without even taking a seat. “My name is Valerie Cooper. What I’m about to do may well be the biggest mistake of my career, but I have a lot of faith in you. If you screw this up for me, I will be forced to turn you over to my associate, Mr. Gyrich, and I can assure you, you don’t want that to happen.” She sat down in the chair.
“Mr. Schofeld, have you ever heard of a project called ‘Freedom Force’?”
