Chapter Forty: Four to Midnight

“I’m right, aren’t I?” CJ pushed for an answer. “Come on, you can tell me!” She was pleading with Agent Ryker. The two had hiked to a nearby village, and were hiding out in a small storeroom as they tried to figure out what to do next. “You’re him, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” Agent Ryker confessed. “I knew your fathers. I was a Supercool, briefly, when I posed as Kyle. I know how he thinks, and feels, and acts, and I don’t want to see him dead any more than you do. We’ll get back to them, and warn them, don’t worry.”
“This is so cool!” CJ giggled. “I can’t believe I’m hanging out with an actual Skrull!” Agent Ryker cocked a confused eyebrow at the girl.
“CJ,” he said. “Surely Charles or Joe or Kyle must have told you? I’m not a Skrull.”
“What?!??” asked CJ.
“No,” Ryker said. “I-“ His words were interrupted by the sudden rumble of cannon fire. The wall nearest Ryker and CJ came crashing suddenly down, and into the breach stepped three green-cloaked, metallic figures.
“Doombots!” CJ cried.
“You will come with us,” the nearest android insisted. A bolt of lightning sprang from its hand, striking Ryker to the floor. CJ reached into her cape for a weapon, but instead pulled out a bundle of yellow fabric. She tossed the fabric into the air, and jumped into it....
CJ, and the yellow fabric, disappeared.

“Well, if I’m right, and face it, I’m never wrong, the bar that ‘we’ attacked should be right around this corner.” Joe, Charles, and Kyle turned the corner. It was a terrible sight. A terrible site. The bar had been completely razed. Paramedics and firemen ran this way and that, trying desperately to save those few folks with any life left in them. Policemen were carting away bodies and sifting through evidence. Several camera crews got footage of the scene.
“The Supercools are definitely to blame for this,” Kyle overheard one policeman say. “And we’ll do whatever it takes to bring them to justice.”
“Excuse me, sir?” Kyle asked, drawing that cop aside. “But we were down, um, by the waterfront earlier this evening, and we saw the Supercools fighting some other villains. So they couldn’t have done this, right?”
“The Supercools are definitely to blame for what happened here tonight, son. Why don’t you run on home?”
“But would it hurt to just check? There were other cops at the scene! They-“
“The Supercools are definitely to blame. The Supercools are definitely to blame.”
“Is that all you can say?” Kyle asked. He reached to put his hand on the cop’s shoulder. The police officer punched Kyle, sprawling him across the ground.
“The Supercools are definitely to blame!” he shouted, tears beginning to form in his eyes. Joe and Charles, seeing Kyle attacked, instinctively shifted into their superheroic forms. Kyle, fearing recognition, followed suit. People gasped, cameras pivoted, hands pointed, and guns were drawn as the crowd noticed the sudden appearance of the Supercools amongst them. Several nearby police officers shouted simultaneously “The Supercools are to blame,” and moved to arrest the heroes.
“We don’t want to hurt anyone!” Mr. Negativity shouted. “But we didn’t do this, and we won’t submit to arrest.” Something was wrong with those cops, and Charles knew it. Somehow, he also knew that Joe was thinking the same thing.
“The Supercools are to blame!” the battery of cops shouted. They drew their weapons, and fired at the Supercools. Their guns turned to teddy bears.
“Something is not right here,” the Scavenger insisted.
“Powers! A power signature, there!” No Powers Boy pointed. A flicker of movement caught the heroes’ eyes from a nearby alley. Mr. Negativity flew over the crowds, following the motion. The Scavenger skated quickly behind, clearing the crowds with judicious near-misses of his flamethrower. No Powers Boy sprinted to keep up.
Mr. Negativity and the Scavenger reached the mouth of the alley at the same time. Two figures turned to face the heroes.
“Impossible!” the old man shouted. “We were discovered by the Supercools in only one of seventeen possible realities! How lucky they must be!”
“Damn right we’re lucky!” Mr. Negativity shouted. He recognized this particular foe from their battle in another dimension. “Now give it up, Ticktock!”
“And you, too, Misfit!” the Scavenger supplied. He recognized these foes from the pages of Avengers West Coast.
“Why, I know you,” Ticktock said as No Powers Boy rounded the corner. “It’s Chaos Squadron! But with a completely different line-up!”
“You know,” Mr. Negativity said. “This sort of thing is going to keep-”
“Don’t,” said the Scavenger.
The Misfit roared, and hurled himself at Mr. Negativity. He was a hulking, brutish man, with disproportionate skeletal structure and musculature. Some body parts seemed glued on from some other source. Even his hair, worn in a tall blond mohawk, seemed stretched unnaturally, all the result of a strength augmentation program gone awry. The strength augmentation part worked, though, as Mr. Negativity learned. Mr. N was sent sprawling back out of the alley, landing in the rubble with a painful thud! The crowd had mostly cleared as the battle began, though a few newspeople stayed behind to cover the scene.
“The Supercools are to blame!” the cops shouted, descending upon Mr. Negativity.
“Not again,” he said, blasting the pavement in front of the cops, keeping them momentarily at bay.
Back in the alley, No Powers Boy drew his gun, and was suddenly surprised to find his cape wrapping itself around his head, covering his eyes, ears, and mouth. “I can’t use my powers on anything I can’t see!” he shouted.
“Your timing was impeccable, my dear,” Ticktock cackled as Gypsy Moth descended from the sky, tightening her telekinetic hold on No Powers Boy. With a wave of his hand, Ticktock froze time in front of himself, pinning the leaping Scavenger in mid-air. “Once Misfit finishes off Mr. Negativity, and we turn these ruffians over to our good friends in the police department, we’ll have taken our revenge in the most perfect way possible.”
“Hulda be fevver mu?” No Powers Boy asked. It was supposed to be “What did we ever do to you?” Ticktock didn’t bother to comment.
Misfit’s fist plowed into the side of Mr. Negativity’s face. The hero was sent sprawling again. His Negativity aura began to flicker as Charles struggled to keep his eyes open. Misfit was dishing out far more physical punishment than even Mr. Negativity’s resistant body could handle. Through heavy lids, Charles saw Misfit moving in for the kill. And suddenly, he knew what he had to do. CLANG!
Misfit was charging at Mr. Negativity, and paused for only the briefest of moments when his intended victim vanished. That moment was all the Scavenger needed to plant his Wonder Glove firmly into Misfit’s already battered face. This time, it was Misfit’s turn to fly backwards. Just then, the Scavenger threw himself to the ground as matching solid clouds came swooping close to his head. The Brothers Grimm doubled back as one pulled a pie from seemingly nowhere. They taunted the Scavenger, alternating their sentences.
“Little Jack Horner...”
“...sat in a corner...”
“...eating a Christmas pie.”
“He put in his thumb...”
“...and pulled out a bomb!” They finished the last sentence together.
“And he said, ‘Now the Scavenger dies!’”
Sure enough, a little plum-colored grenade sailed towards the Scavenger. And what do you want to bet, he thought to himself. That their magic cancels out my Cestus?
“Gypsy Moth, look out!” Ticktock cried. “In 7 of the next 9 possible realities...” But Ticktock’s warning was cut short. Unable to use his powers on anything but what he could see, No Powers Boy used his powers on his own cape, stripping it from his costume. Then, with another flash of his powers, No Powers Boy blocked Ticktock’s powers, freeing Mr. Negativity from the field of frozen time.
Mr. Negativity took immediately to the sky. Gypsy Moth tried in vain to catch a hold of some part of Mr. Negativity’s costume, but since, technically, there was no costume... Mr. Negativity snapped his fingers, and two miniature explosions popped next to Gypsy Moth’s head. Stunned, the young woman fell toward the ground. Mr. Negativity scooped her up in a very gentlemanly grasp, and set the young woman on a nearby rooftop, then spun back to help his friends.
The Scavenger realized he’d never avoid the explosion’s shock wave, even if he dodged the bomb itself. And he wasn’t sure his defenses would let him survive the full brunt of the blast. So, he did the only thing he could think of. He fired his Wonder Glove, blasting the bomb while it was still halfway between himself and the Brothers Grimm. All three combatants were blown to separate ends of the battlefield. The Scavenger struggled to his feet just in time to be garroted by a dirty red scarf, wielded by another member of the Night Shift, the Tatterdemalion. No Powers Boy, emerging from the alley while mentally reforming his cape, aimed his pistol at the Scavenger’s attacker. Before he could pull the trigger, though, No Powers Boy had to duck quickly to avoid being skewered by a giant needle, wielded by its eponymous villain. The Needle pinned No Powers Boy’s cape to the wall, and for the second time in as many minutes, No Powers Boy was forced to eliminate the cape from his costume, this time to avoid the equally lethal pitchfork wielded by the Scarecrow. No Powers Boy knew he couldn’t avoid both attacks for long, and so retreated to another section of street, aided by the cover-fire laid down by Mr. Negativity.
Mr. Negativity had fired broadly, to be sure not to hit his teammate. Once No Powers Boy was out of the way, though, Mr. Negativity took aim once again at the Scarecrow and the Needle. He missed, though, as four powerful steel cables wrapped themselves around his arms and legs. The strange, tingling sensation running up his spine told Mr. Negativity that the cables were sapping portions of his superhuman strength and energy away from him, a fact made all-too-painfully clear when he was slammed down into the pavement. Five uniformed police officers, bearing the unique weaponry of Code: Blue, New York’s superhuman SWAT team, stood around Mr. Negativity when he landed.
“This is all the Supercools’ fault,” they said in unison.
As the Tatterdemalion pulled tightly against the Scavenger’s throat, Misfit picked himself off the ground, and charged toward the hero. As Misfit drew closer, the Scavenger’s SunSword ignited, severing the ends of the Tatterdemalion’s scarf. The Scavenger’s Asgardian Elbow knocked the wind out of the Tatterdemalion. “Sexier alien women than you have tried choking me to death, and they failed, too,” the Scavenger laughed. “And as for you, Misfit...” the monster was almost upon him now. The Scavenger’s foot lashed out at the nearby pavement, breaking free an unused parking meter. Hefting it into his hands like a baseball bat, the Scavenger swung his weapon at the Misfit with all his strength. The bulky reader connected with Misfit’s face, spinning the monster all the way around before dropping him to the ground. “I think a little change’ll do you good,” the Scavenger quipped. He turned around to face the Tatterdemalion again. This time, the man cracked his scarf like a whip. The Scavenger watched, amazed, as the scarf knit itself back together, until Gypsy Moth floated gently behind her cohort. Suddenly, the Scavenger felt Mr. Negativity’s pain in the back of his head. “Be right back,” he promised his attackers. CLANG!
The scarf cracked out again, and this time, Mr. Negativity caught it with a quick snap of his wrist. Lines of black energy coursed up the scarf, then instantly shattered, slipping away back into Charles’ body, and leaving the scarf completely disintegrated. Tatterdemalion howled as though he himself were hurt by the attack, but Mr. Negativity’s attentions were elsewhere. “You,” he said, pointing at Gypsy Moth, “Should have stayed down.” This time, twin bolts of Nega-energy shot from his hands, bouncing off the woman’s wings. Gypsy Moth fell to the ground, clearly out of this fight.
Code: Blue aimed their weapons at the pinned Mr. Negativity, and fired... coating the Scavenger in KY Jelly. “Yuck!” The Scavenger moaned. “This is fucking disgusting! I would rather have been shot!” He stomped his foot in equal parts attack and frustration, knocking the members of Code: Blue on their asses. “The Supercools are to blame,” they replied as a unit.
“Right,” the Scavenger said. “This is clearly our fault. But if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a few members of the Night Shift to bust.”
“Bust?” a loud voice cackled nearby. The Scavenger skated quickly to one side, avoiding the thrust of the Scarecrow’s pitchfork. “Haven’t you heard? We’re the good guys in this case, out to round up the mean ol’ Supercools.”
“Why?” No Powers Boy asked, jamming his gun in Ticktock’s face.
“It was our idea first,” stammered Ticktock.
“We were villains posing as crimefighters,” Tatterdemalion whined as he tried to land an acidic glove on Mr. Negativity.
“But then the Thunderbolts stole our rap, and ruined the whole thing. And now you’re trying to do it, too?” The Scarecrow jabbed his pitchfork again.
“No!” the Scavenger cried. “We really are heroes! And besides, no one ever really thought you guys were heroes; you were just villains who beat up other villains. Which makes you dishonorable to boot, I suppose.”
No Powers Boy had socked Ticktock in the head, knocking the old man out. Now, he was using well-placed laser blasts to keep the Needle at bay.
“Can’t fight/Starlight!” the Brothers Grimm shouted, buzzing Mr. Negativity. Their hands glowed with what seemed to truly be the light from a star. Mr. Negativity screamed in pain, clutching his eyes. He quickly took to the air to avoid the Tatterdemalion’s attacks. The Brothers Grimm followed.
“Uh-oh!” taunted the Scarecrow, driving his weapon at the Scavenger’s chest. “Looks like my pitchfork won’t be stopped by your weapon screen!”
“Oh, damn,” the Scavenger deadpanned, catching the tool in mid-swipe. With a flick of his thumb, the Scavenger broke the weapon in half. “How about a little fire, Scarecrow?!?” he roared, blasting away with his flamethrower. The Scarecrow took off running in the opposite direction. Then, from behind, a pair of broad metal shackles closed around the Scavenger’s arms.
One of the Brothers was playing cat’s cradle as the two zipped near Mr. Negativity. With every successive “move”, the game became larger, thicker, and much more elaborate, working its way into a giant net. The two were chanting, “Can’t be shot/Can’t be stabbed/But this hero can be nabbed.”
No Powers Boy pushed his shoulder into the attack, allowing the tip of the Needle’s weapon to pierce his battle armor. No Powers Boy winced through the pain, and took advantage of the momentary opportunity it afforded him. He fired, striking one of the Brothers in the back of the head.
The cradle will fall...
“Ow! My Brother, I’ve been hit!” “And dropped the cradle- Holy-“ Mr. Negativity cracked the two Brothers’ heads together.
“Enough with the rhyming, already!” he shouted to the air. “Though I do appreciate the sound of your voice leading me to you.”
The Brothers Grimm’s cat’s cradle net fell to the ground, perfectly draping itself across the Tatterdemalion and the Scarecrow. Tatterdemalion immediately set to work trying to burn his way free, but soon realized that the Brothers’ magic was stronger than his own.
“ !” Needle cried as he pulled his weapon free. No Powers Boy shouted once more in pain as the weapon was removed. The Scavenger saw the Needle raise his weapon, and knew there was nothing he could do to save his friend.
Mr. Negativity spun, and fired blindly at the ground. The blast caught the Needle in the back perfectly, as though Mr. Negativity had known exactly where to fire.
The Scavenger took in a grateful breath as the Needle fell, but exhaled it quickly as he was thrown to the ground by several angry cops. A line of standard-issue policemen pointed their guns at No Powers Boy, who quickly dropped his own weapon. And, with Mr. Negativity still recovering his vision, the remainder of Code: Blue had no problem hitting him with another grapple-line.
“The Supercools are clearly to blame,” the cops agreed.
“Something looks funny with these cops,” No Powers Boy noted. “Did we get all of the Night Shift?”
“Seems that way,” the Scavenger said. “All but the Digger, who wasn’t with them. Neither was the Hangman, or the Werewolf, or the Shroud, or Moon Knight, or D- Wait a minute!” The Scavenger looked his nearest captor straight in the eye. “Snap out of it,” he ordered. And it worked. Like a chain reaction, confused expressions swept through the police line. Near the back, an unnoticed woman in a trenchcoat tried to slip away. Several handcuffs were produced, dragging the woman back to the battlefield.
“Dansen Macabre,” the Scavenger said. “Now that’s all of them.”

The cops didn’t really apologize to Charles, Kyle, or Joe. But they did let the heroes go, once their memories returned and they realized they’d been played for fools. They took a few of the Night Shift in, but of course, they all escaped a few days later. Most members of the Night Shift haven’t seen the inside of a prison in many, many years, not since Spider-Woman brought the Jailer to justice. Joe made a mental note to take the boys out to track down the Night Shift in a couple of days. But first....
“Jobs,” he said. Charles and Kyle each let out a low moan. “Jobs,” Joe repeated, more firmly. “We’re not going to crash with the Fantastic Four, or the New Warriors, or the X-Men, or the Avengers, or spend our secret identity lives mooching off the heroes we’ve already met. Now pay attention, because this is important. WE HAVE NO MORE MONEY!” Joe paused to light a cigarette. “This is our last night in Chez Supercool, and check-out time in 11:00 tomorrow. So bright and early tomorrow morning, I’m going out to the Daily Bugle to see if my newspaper work at Bradley carries over here in the big city. Chuck, have you given any thought to where you might look around?”
“Yeah, actually,” Charles said, “I thought I’d fly up to the Massachusetts Academy.”
“Good thinking!” Joe said. “With their doors suddenly open to human students, they’re bound to need all sorts of extra staff, like RCs for the dorms and things. And with your powers, the commute won’t be so long.”
“Right,” Charles said. “Only, I was thinking I might be a math teacher there.”
“Oh,” Joe said. “Um... well, if they offer you an RC job, don’t turn it down, okay? I mean, Sean and Emma are about the only two civilians we know who can vouch for us in this world. Maybe Kyle could get a job with She-Hulk!”
“Actually...” Kyle began.
“I was kidding,” Joe said. “You have to get a job at Marvel Burger.” He jammed his cigarette in Kyle’s direction for emphasis.
“But-“ Kyle began again.
“Think about it,” Joe insisted. “Most jobs pay bi-weekly, but Marvel Burger pays once a week. Even if Chuck or I manage to get one of our jobs to give us an advance, we’ll still be hurting for money pretty damn quickly. No money equals no place to sleep, and I know you can’t fit “NPtSB” on that shiny new costume of yours. Plus, you’ll be able to bring us home free food, which is going to help us out a lot for the first couple of days.”
“I w-“
“Kyle,” Joe insisted, stubbing out his cigarette. “Please just go get a job at Marvel Burger. Then in a couple of weeks, Chuck and I will be bringing in enough money that you can afford to go somewhere else. Okay?”
“Okay,” Kyle moaned.

“Kyle Reeser, your time on this earth is over,” the cold metal voice intoned. A gauntleted hand jumped across a stylized keyboard as two hard eyes studied countless monitors. On one, Kyle Reeser lay on a small cot in the middle of a stone cell. The voice spoke again. “Vengeance is mine, and with it, the fate of the entire world. The Age of Kyle is over. Now, usher in the Age of Doom!”